What does a caregiver for someone with dementia and a detective have in common?
It’s not a trick question, I promise, it’s actually one of the main pieces of advice that I impart. To start, both have puzzles to solve. In their search for answers, they must both begin by asking the key question “Why?.” Then uncover motives, gather clues and use their powers of observation to reach conclusions. The mysteries that the caregiver is looking to solve relate to understanding why someone with dementia is acting the way they do. Why are they agitated, or disoriented, or disruptive? What is the meaning behind their behaviour?
The Story of Jean and Kay
This brings me to the story of Jean and Kay, two close friends. As friends do, Kay could tell something wasn’t quite right with how Jean was behaving. For over a year she just didn’t seem to be acting like her usual self. Kay knew that Jean’s cognitive functioning was declining but couldn’t pinpoint the exact cause of her strange behaviour. One day, while Jean and Kay were together, Jean began wandering away from her home and refused to return. At a loss for what to do, Kay followed Jean in the hot sun. Desperate for help, Kay called me for advice and I suggested an ambulance may be needed. I thought Jean could have been experiencing delirium due to a physical condition, such as an infection.
Transitioning to a Care Home
From then on, it became clear that Jean could no longer live on her own, and so she was sent to a care home. Yet, even there Jean’s strange behaviours continued. Many people told Kay it was because of her cognitive decline. Since Jean wasn’t settling in well, it was soon decided that Jean should be transferred to a different care facility with more support for those experiencing increased behaviours. Shortly after the transfer Jean was taken to a hospital where the reason for her behaviours was finally uncovered. It turned out, that Jean had been suffering for almost a year from a blocked bladder.
Take Notice of the Changed Behaviours
Sadly it took lots of time and different people for this particular case to be solved. This isn’t uncommon. What this case teaches us is that we should try to continue to be detectives. Investigate when we are noticing changed behaviours. Kay had been able to support Jean on this journey, not only through her friendship and care. She continually was wearing her detective hat to try to better understand her friend’s behaviour by not being afraid to ask “Why?”. My hope is that more people, from friends to family members to medical professionals and professional caregivers, begin trying out their own detective hats as early as possible. So that physical ailments, such as the one Jean experienced, can be detected earlier and addressed in order to help her alleviate suffering. By thinking like a detective, we can all begin to understand that there truly is a meaning to be uncovered behind the behaviour.
